


Childish Mannerisms

by PainedEggs



Category: One Piece
Genre: Bathing/Washing, Brotherly Love, Fluff and Humor, Friendship, Gen, Platonic Male/Male Relationships, Unfortunate Events, three-shot, uh oh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-05-06
Updated: 2020-05-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 22:08:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 609
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24044143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PainedEggs/pseuds/PainedEggs
Summary: Zoro and Sanji. They were friends. They were enemies. Sometimes they fought each other. Other times they fought for each other. They were pretty much brothers. They could be childish at times.
Relationships: Roronoa Zoro & Vinsmoke Sanji, TRULY PLATONIC I SWEAR, or is it??? - Relationship
Comments: 1
Kudos: 16





	Childish Mannerisms

**Author's Note:**

> I love them together. Next will be a story with Chopper!
> 
> I SWEAR IM STILL WORKING ON IT

Zoro and Sanji. They were friends. They were enemies. Sometimes they fought each other. Other times they fought for each other. They were pretty much brothers. They could be childish at times.

Once in the bath:

Zoro and Sanji,  
Splashing away in the bath.  
Who’s balls are bigger?

Sanji and Zoro were in the bath together, along with the rest of the boys. They were talking about the battle they just won against the Marines.

“So, I, being the great warrior of the sea I am, beat half of the army with one strike!”

“Really?!?”

“The Navy didn’t have the balls to fight me!”

“Woah! Usopp, you’re so cool!”

Zoro smirks and says, “The Navy was too scared to fight any of us!”

“There was that one guy who packed a good punch! He had the balls to fight me, but mine are bigger!”

“Tch, as if.”

“Eh? Whaddya say, you stupid marimo?”

“You don’t have big balls.”

“Mmm? What about you? My balls are 100% bigger than yours.”

“Eeeeh?”

They both stood up in all of their glory and walked towards each other, unluckily for Luffy, who was in the middle of the tub.

“What do you mean? I’m just stating facts.”

“If your balls are big, then mine are fuckin’ giant!”

“Eeeeh?”

“Eh?”

“EH?”

“EHHH?”

They keep inching closer and closer to each other’s faces, and indirectly Luffy’s. They eventually butt foreheads and continue to insult each other.

“MY BALLS ARE GIGANTIC!”

“WELL MINE ARE BIGGER THAN THE GRAND LINE!”

“WELL MINE ARE BIGGER THAN THE EARTH!”

“WELL MINE ARE BIGGER THAN THE SUN!”

Luffy is staring at both of their balls, quite literally, as he is in the middle, now on the back wall, of the tub. He’s trying to inspect them to see who’s are actually bigger, and to him, they look the same size. Meanwhile, Zoro and Sanji are still inching closer and closer, close enough their noses touch, close enough their chests touch, close enough-

“WELL MINE ARE BIGGER THAN THE GALAXY!”

“WELL MINE ARE BIGGER THAN THE UNIVERSE!”

“WELL MINE ARE- GACK!”

-their balls touch.

They scurry back to their respective sides of the tub and stare at each other in disbelief. They want to insult the latter, but they can’t find the words. Their mouths are hanging open, shaking slightly.

“Hmmm… Zoro’s are bigger!”

They turn to Luffy, who has the same happy-go-lucky smile he’s always had, still with their mouths hanging open.

“L…”

“LUFFY!” They say in unison.

“WERE YOU STARING AT OUR BALLS?”

“DON’T DO THAT, IDIOT!”

Their words are intertwined until a final,

“WHAT THE HELL!?”

from both of them. All Luffy does is laugh.

“That was… unfortunate,” Franky musters out.

“MMmmM…” That’s all Usopp can say.

Chopper decides to keep his mouth shut, and Brook does the same. The two involved in that little… “accident” were red-faced and angry.

“But even if you were staring at our balls…”

Sanji speaking piqued the attention of the rest of the crew.

“THAT CAN’T BE TRUUUEEEE!” Sanji was now bent over in the water, slowly slamming his fist on the bottom.

Zoro suppresses a chuckle, well, at least he tries to, and smirks. He’s obviously over the shock of his balls touching Sanji’s and Luffy staring at both of their balls.

Zoro fails to suppress his chuckles any longer and laughs “What, is it cold?” out. Sanji, on all fours, lifts his head up and says some incomprehensible madness. Zoro laughs at his depressed friend, clenching his stomach and slowly sliding down into the water.

“What’s up with Sanji,” Nami thinks out loud as she sees them exiting the bath.

**Author's Note:**

> How'd you like it? I want to know how you feel about my work! I, personally, am really proud of it.
> 
> Grammarly said it was sad lmao
> 
> [Just watched film Z, took a picture of the boys falling frame by frame, turns out Sanji got a face full of Zoro dick!]


End file.
